He sniffs some more, then brings his legs up, curling as he shifts closer to Akira... as close as they can possibly get. He knows he doesn't remotely deserve any of this, and yet he's starved for it. Starved for these gentle, caring touches, for the warm arms around him, for the soft lips grazing his skin... He feels like he could never have enough of it.
He wants for this moment to last forever. That the drink never wears off, that he's able to just be with Akira without those usual thoughts and grudges tormenting this. This is so much better, so much easier... so why is it so hard for him? Why is he hurting him, over and over and over again?
Why can't he stop...?
He nuzzles into his shoulder, taking deep breaths, closing his eyes once more as he just dismisses those awful thoughts for now, and focuses on that soothing hand running up and down his spine.]
shhh they're beautiful
He sniffs some more, then brings his legs up, curling as he shifts closer to Akira... as close as they can possibly get. He knows he doesn't remotely deserve any of this, and yet he's starved for it. Starved for these gentle, caring touches, for the warm arms around him, for the soft lips grazing his skin... He feels like he could never have enough of it.
He wants for this moment to last forever. That the drink never wears off, that he's able to just be with Akira without those usual thoughts and grudges tormenting this. This is so much better, so much easier... so why is it so hard for him? Why is he hurting him, over and over and over again?
Why can't he stop...?
He nuzzles into his shoulder, taking deep breaths, closing his eyes once more as he just dismisses those awful thoughts for now, and focuses on that soothing hand running up and down his spine.]